Men openly chase beauty, claiming it’s human nature, biology, or some other fancy excuse they read in a YouTube comment. Meanwhile, women who want financial security are hit with every cliché in the book: “gold digger,” “superficial,” and my personal favorite, “why don’t you just earn your own money?” But let’s pause and think about this for a second. Isn’t money, like beauty, just another resource? So why does one preference get a free pass while the other gets an unsolicited morality lecture? Spoiler alert: society is a little weird about what women are allowed to want.



1. The Beauty Obsession: Men Get a Free Pass

Beauty is seen as a status symbol for men.

First, let’s address the beauty obsession. Men have been openly prioritizing looks since the dawn of time—or at least since cavemen figured out how to flirt by gifting a nice rock. Fast-forward a few thousand years, and not much has changed. We still have men choosing partners based on symmetry, curves, and whatever that elusive “it factor” is that makes Instagram influencers so popular. And society? “Oh, he’s just a visual creature! Boys will be boys!” Society practically cheers them on, creating entire industries to fuel their preferences. Men are praised for “knowing what they want.” Entire industries thrive on this demand for beauty: cosmetics, fashion, fitness, you name it. Wanting beauty isn’t just normalized—it’s celebrated, packaged, and sold with a bow on top.



2. The "Gold Digger" Stereotype

Women seeking financial stability are labeled “gold diggers.”

A woman says she’s looking for financial stability in a partner, and suddenly, she’s branded a gold digger. The backlash is immediate and loud: “Why don’t you just make your own money?” “Love isn’t about material things!” Oh, please. Let’s not pretend love happens in a vacuum. Romance is great, but it won’t pay off your loans or cover your bills. Here’s the kicker: most women aren’t even asking for billionaire-level wealth. They’re asking for
stability—a partner who can hold their own and contribute to building a life together. Men who prioritize beauty are seen as romantic, even noble. “He just wants to be with someone who makes him happy,” they say. But a woman wanting a partner with financial resources? Suddenly, she’s “calculating.” Because, of course, love should be pure and unconditional... until it’s time to plan a wedding, pay for a house, or have kids, at which point financial stability magically becomes everyone’s business.



3. The Underlying Hypocrisy

Beauty is praised, but financial desires are shamed.

Here’s the hard truth: men and women both want things that make life easier. Beauty makes men feel good; money makes women feel safe. But we’ve collectively decided that a man wanting beauty is “natural” while a woman wanting financial stability is somehow manipulative. You know what’s manipulative? Pretending these desires aren’t two sides of the same coin. People want what helps them survive and thrive. Beauty represents health and vitality. Money represents security and opportunity. Both are incredibly valuable, and neither makes someone “bad” for wanting it. And let’s not pretend men aren’t benefiting from this double standard. They can openly value beauty without judgment, while women have to tiptoe around their preferences, as if asking for stability is somehow asking for too much.



4. The Real Root of It

Everyone values traits that make life easier.

Why does this double standard exist? Simple: it’s the lingering remnants of outdated gender roles, dressed up in modern clothes. Men are expected to provide, women are expected to be the prize. So when a man wants beauty, it fits the narrative—he’s just choosing the prettiest prize. But when a woman flips the script and says, “Actually, I’d like some provision too,” the system short-circuits. Because how dare she want the same security men have been chasing since the invention of property?



5. Let’s Drop the Act

Preferences should be normalized, not judged.

At the end of the day, no one’s out here building a relationship on beauty or money alone. The dream is love, connection, partnership—all the squishy, human stuff that makes life worthwhile. But acting like one gender gets a free pass on their preferences while the other is condemned? That’s not love. That’s hypocrisy. So the next time someone raises an eyebrow at a woman wanting financial security, remind them that relationships are partnerships. And partnerships are about mutual benefit. Because guess what? There’s no rulebook that says men get to be practical while women have to be hopelessly romantic. Let’s all just admit what we’re looking for and stop pretending one preference is holier than the other.